Soviet PR Specialist now employed by FAI

The Mounties always get their man. And the FAI get...somebody at some point or another who might not speak English. Basically whoever runs away the least farthest is most attractive I suppose.

Well it looks like we've finally trapped someone and blackmailed them into becoming the new Irish soccer manager. Giovanni Trapattoni has been lured away from the ahem, high profile coaching job at Red Bull Salzburg. He's well known for his brand of defensive football, which is great seeing as we have such defensive luminaries as John O'Shea and Ian Harte (still listed in Irish squad on www.fai.ie) in our squad. Considering the fact that he doesn't have a whole load of English it's just as well that he's got that whole body language thing sorted out - it might come in handy when his interpreter can't translate whatever language it is Robbie Keane speaks:

Speaking of the FAI website, there's some classic back-slapping and pretty generous write-ups for the squad:

IAN HARTE:
"Ian wil (that's not my mistake) not be 30 until August, 2007, (or is that) but it seems like dead ball expert Ian Harte has been around for ever."
Too right he's been around for ever, and he's been shit forever too.

GARY DOHERTY:
"Gary is a real Mr. Versatile who is equally at home in defence or attack."
Gary is a real Mr. Potato Head who is more at home anywhere that is not a football field.

JOHN O'SHEA:
"Was impressive at centre-back against Wales in UEFA Championship in November, 2007."
Was impressive against a side ranked 58th in the world who only fielded one striker and were playing for pride and nothing else.

KEVIN KILBANE:
"...his honest hard work help make him an invaluable versatile addition to Ireland's team...powered home a header in the away match to San Marino in February 2007."
Less. Said. The. Better.

It's good to know that somebody rates them anyway...

Embarassed?

Norn Iron (seen here celebrating winning a corner kick against Iceland) are now ranked above us in the soccer standings. That's nearly as embarassing as being in the car with your racist dad when he's being interviewed by CNN. Or nearly as embarassing as realizing you're on this website. And being Tagg Romney.

Rugby: A sport for hard men

I really like rugby. It's a winner sport - big hits, complex plays, passion and sheer physicality. Plus every now and then something like this happens...

Stade Francais are a quality team, and my favourites for the European Cup. Animal team, full of top French, Argentine and Italian internationals. The thing is is that their a Parisien team, and the south is the traditional bastion of French rugby. The southern French rugby player is basically a sweaty, toothless, half-peasant half-athlete French culchie. So they always view Paris as Irish culchies view Dublin: a dirty place full of homosexuals.

So some Parisien marketer thought what better way to make our team stand out than wrap them in hi-glow pink skintight jerseys. This interesting take on the rugby kit has more in common with the Tour de France than top tier rugby (ironically enough cycling is the darling sport of Paris). That's been the way for some time now, and they've just released the 2007/2008 version:







Pretty risqué, no? Now what I noticed immediately was this poor guy's expression. He doesn't look to happy, does he? I might hazard a guess that although a Stade Francais player he's not Parisien, and therefore not comfortable with the idea of lying at the bottom of a ruck in that getup.












Apparently it's not seen as cutting edge anymore, as they've been wairing pink kits for a while now and therefore feel like smacking kit design firmly into the noughties. Enter the homage to Magnum PI and Hunter S. Thompson's lovechild: THE BRAND SPANKING NEW HOME STRIP:







Now doesn't he look a lot happier? Same dude, different strip, happier footballer. Still though, it must be difficult sometimes having to wear any of those kits. It's bad losing a big game, but if you've to go back into the dressingroom after and sit there thinking "not only do I feel like shit for losing, I look like a Dutch sex tourist on holidays in the Phillipines"...