Absolut gobshite

It's incredible how the internets works. In less than five minutes I have gone from looking at a €45 bottle of water to laughing my ass off at the futility of life as an impressionable 13 year old in modern society...

1. Look at twentymajor's blog post about "bling water" being sold in Superquinn.
2. Search "bling water" on google as am wondering how water could cost that much, and what fucktards would buy it.
3. Discover that Paris Hilton was spotted pouring a bottle into her ratdog's bowl. That daft bint should be arrested again for inciting hatred.
4. Discover a new blog and a new word which I will appropriate: "asshat"
5. See a result "Where can i buy Bling water??? also is it alcoh..." and need to see if the suffix "olic" appears on the post as that would make the poster a complete idiot.
6. See that "olic" does in fact appear and laugh uncontrollably for a good 40 seconds. As the poster admits that they're only 13 and think that water is alcoholic I decide that their profile is a must see.
7. Not disappointed! Comedy gold ensues! Discover the selfishness of California lovers and the dichotomy of the iphone:
   
   things i hate: WHEN PEOPLE ARE LIKE " I LOVE CALIFORNIA" BUT NEVER HAVE EVEN BEEN THERE AND THEY TALK ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME AND THEIR SCREENAME HAS LIKE CALI IN IT OR SOMETHING!!! SOOOO ANNOYING!!! also i hate iphones i just don't get the point of having a phone and an ipod i personally think they should be separate.
   
   
8. Even more laughter! Dillusional teenie also asks questions about finding an agent, how ebay works and how can she and her 5 bffs become famous. Absolut internets.
   

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