The end of the world is going to happen sometime next May by the way. So for some reason the bossman decided that they should spend all winter in a cave in sub-zero temperatures. As with all religious leaders, their spiritual guide Pyotr Kuznetsov is leading by example and not living in the cave. This legend was diagnosed with schizophrenia and has been sleeping in a coffin for the last few months. Now that's a guy who's hands you want to put your life in.
The reports from Russian media are fantastic - it's hard to know whats true as they heavily censor media and they are a nation of crazies, but there are some classic quotes. "They are ordinary Christians, they just don't accept tax numbers and passports" said Father Georgy, the local priest. Well it's hardly worth killing yourself and a bunch of kids over it, is it? Apparently a lot of people in Russia have refused their new identification numbers as they contain "satanic combinations of numbers" - yeah it's called a taxable identity. Welcome to the west.
As usual with the Russian authorities, useful information is at a premium: "Their supplies include half a ton of honey and a lot of jam," says Alevtina Volchkova, chief prosecutor of Bekovsky district. And we all know what those sick bastards could do with honey and jam... feel free to pun away about sticky situations and the like, but I'm so above that.
My favourite though is this nugget: "Attempts to coax them out of the cave or at least to release the children have been unsuccessful as the sect members have taken a vow of silence". Brilliant. Creating your own Catch-22. Maybe that should read .22 ...
Well I guess they've tried the politically correct way of police negotiations, it's probably not too long before we see the more 'explosive' style of negotiation that the Russian army prides herself in.
Game Over.
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